Saturday, May 30, 2009

Has It Really Been A Week?

Geez...time flies when you're not doing much. I uploaded my two stories, "The Bookseller" and "Margaret Malloy" to Scribd.com and EditRed. I'm only doing it to kind of get the feel of spreading my work around and maybe getting some feedback. I'm pretty sure this is what I'd like to do for a living. God knows, I've already got the temperament of a spoiled genius. Now if I just had the bankroll...
It's Saturday night and I'm remembering the "good old days" when I'd be getting ready to go out, "Golden Girls" on the TV, 2 or 3 beers already in me, seeing which outfit would: 1. Make my butt/groin look hot and 2. Make my arms look beefy. And then it was the hair...Lord. I think I finally figured out the best way to do it. When it's towel-dry, throw a little gel into it and generally get it where I want it. Later on, I can adjust as necessary. It were times like that when I just wanted to shave my head and be done with it. I think towards "the end of my career", or right before I met John and stopped going out, I would wear a baseball cap a lot. Number one because I had "receded"more than I was comfortable with and Number two I just didn't give a crap anymore. And I did look cute. I figured if I got lucky that night, it was all coming off anyway. And then I'd have something to throw on my head as I took the "walk of shame" out of there. *Sigh* Good times...
I'm alone with the kids tonight because John's meeting someone from his atheist's meeting at JavaBoys. If I hadn't already gone today, I would have tagged along. Oh hell, he needs his own time sometimes. I'm enjoying the writing, but I wonder if I've run out of things already. Those two things were stories I always had in my head. I wonder if I have anything else to say. Oh yeah...I haven't even begun to dig into the childhood. And the Catholic church and the nuns and being a near-genius at eight....

Saturday, May 23, 2009

Java Boys Saturday

It's Saturday and guess where I am? That's right, at JavaBoys with my broken computer, which technically still works even if the screen is a little loose. I think a nice bead of cement along the bottom should take care of it, along with some binder clamps to keep it all tight. I would really like one of those netbooks but I don't see it happening anytime soon. Maybe I am a little spoiled. Or terribly deprived.

I'm drinking my coffee with some Equal in it. Still not eating sugar. Some cute guys have wandered in on this overcast Saturday. Much better than the usual cemetery club members that haunt this place during the week. There is one guy here who's not much to look at in the face, but his body is smoking. He doesn't look too smart either. That reminds me when Hollis used to kid me about how I looked. Kinda dumb, but a smokin' bod. Oh well, those days have long passed. It's suddenly beginning to get a little more crowded here. Lunch is over and now here they come.

More than once, I've seen and heard people conduct business here. Usually some kind of web site stuff. It reminds me of years ago when John used to design websites. All those "very important" meetings about site content, blah, blah. Everybody had to have a web site. At it's most simplest, it's nothing more than a digital billboard on the information highway. In hindsight, I would have invested that money on incentives for employees or more traditional print media. I wonder how many of those sites are still up...
I can still remember those days, even though now I feel some remorse and loss. All that promise and excitement. Gone now. Just more painful memories for me to avoid. Ok...that's enough or they're going to be pointing at the "crying boy" in JavaBoys.

Oh great. Now I've made myself depressed. Nice job sherlock. Well, I might as well say it: The one thing that upsets me the most is that the one person who I have always trusted and counted on the most is, in my mind, betraying me. He doesn't seem to care for my feelings, as crazy or irrational as they may seem. And so I now am feeling abandoned. It's like he has finally gotten fed up.

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Some Stunning Observations

I was just in the Blogger "Dashboard" and realized I had two blogs floating around. Remember "Cabana Boy"? That's ok, neither do I. I think I was being cute that day when it came time to name the blog. Maybe one day I'll go back and see if there are any posts worth salvaging and bring over to "Here's one..." Or I'll use one blog to blog and the other would showcase my writing. So, let's see...This laptop is officially broken, even though I can still use it, the hinge is toast. Maybe some superglue might fix things. Otherwise, it's off to the Apple store, not that I can afford it. John doesn't seem to get that I need my laptop. I would really love to get a netbook. However, I was just checking out the iTouch on Apple's site. That might be all I need. I'll get that and maybe ask the folks for a scooter for Christmas or my birthday.
Today Mikey graduated from nursery school and we attended the graduation ceremony. Cute doesn't even begin to describe those kids. It was a pretty nice program with film clips, pictures, songs and cookies! Little Julia was there as well as Granma, so the whole family was represented. So I guess the next step is kindergarten? I thought this was kindergarten but apparently not. Silly me. In my day, we hung around the house annoying our mothers until we were six and ready for first grade. Parents these days...such wuss's. It's a Tuesday afternoon, I'm getting a little hungry (forgot lunch dammit!) but I'm still not drinking Coke, so that's good.
I have to be honest. I really do enjoy blogging. I enjoy the writing. I like it even better than those stories I wrote a few days ago. It just fits, well at least for me.
Well, I've had my iced tea here at Java Boys and now I'm getting a little hungry, so I think I'll mosey on home.

Saturday, May 16, 2009

And Away We Go!

Sooo....here's the first of what I hope is many additions to the new and improved "Here's one...". It's a little story I put together about when I was a younger lad living in Pine Hills (Orlando). The one thing I remember from all of this is how important our neighborhoods were to us then. These days, I wouldn't notice if they busted a bank robber outside my condo, but then, oh the drama, the excitement! A small part of me wishes I could still think like I did then. When possibilities were endless to me with no internal censorship. It was good to be a kid, not that I'd want to go back, but still, it was pretty good. I know I'll never again have the same sense of wonder at things, of secret places that no longer exist and friendships/alliances that have since faded.
If you haven't figured it out by now, I was something of a loner when I was a kid. My time alone meant much day-dreaming, pondering, and "thinking of the cwuel way in which I was tweated. (Thanks to JB for that little quote!)


The Duckling
In the neighborhood adjacent to my junior high school, there was a lake that I had to pass twice everyday on my way to and from school. I don't remember if it had a name or if it was even really a lake. It may have actually been an overflow pond used by the neighborhood that, over time, had expanded to the size of half a dozen houses in length and about half that size in width. You had to scale down the sides to get to it and once you were down in it, you couldn't see the road anymore or any of the surrounding houses. You were in your own little world, with its own litte ecosystem. There were plenty of frogs and turtles and once in a while I would bring a fishing pole and would catch a few bream or catfish, always throwing them back. Mainly because the water was filthy and I wasn't so keen on eating them but mainly I just enjoyed the fishing. There was something fun about waiting excitedly for something to tug at my line and then to bring it in, carefully removing the hook, trying not to tear the fish's tender mouth and then throwing it back. Most of the time I would catch bream as they were easy to unhook and throw back. Unfortunately, this particular pond was also loaded with catfish and more often than not, I had to deal with removing a few of them. The easiest way for me was to just slap the line into the water repeatedly until the fish would fall off. I can imagine my father cringing at the sight of this, but I was pretty squeamish and even though I was out there fishing, I didn't really want to touch anything slimy. I remember once I actually caught a snapping turtle, and as I was reeling it in, realized I had hooked it somehow on the side of its shell. Lucky for me, as if I had hooked it in the mouth, I would have lost my lure and tackle, because there was no way I was going near it with my fingers.
One day while exploring, I heard the sounds of small peeping over near a clump of weeds about ten feet away. As I neared the weeds, I saw approximately six tiny ducklings hiding under the grass and not seeing an angry parent nearby, I went for a closer look. They were small, mottled, brown tufts of delight and I imagined taking one home and letting him swim in the bathtub or playing in the hose. I approached even closer and as if by magic, they all scattered quickly and quietly away. I was disappointed they didn't really want to be friends but I still didn't leave and as I watched them, I noticed one was coming very close to me. I could almost reach it with my hand, but not wanting to risk falling in this disgusting water, I found a stick nearby about three feet in length and tried to poke at it. The first few times missed and I was becoming frustrated, slapping at the water menacingly. Finally, one came near, and I struck at it. Catching it cleanly on the head, it felt like nothing at all. But then, I saw that its head was leaning strangely to the right and was circling wildly in the water. There was a sick feeling in my stomach as I realized that I had broken its neck. It would never swim with its family again and would indeed probably die very soon. In my over zealousness to add some fun to my household, I had instead maimed this innocent and fragile creature.
Somewhere inside of me, perhaps the only redeeming quality I still retained from this incident, something said I must not let this poor thing suffer. So I picked up a large rock and slammed it down on its head, killing it instantly. Its body floated lifelessly as I poked at it again with a stick. I could hear his brothers and sisters nearby and suddenly I was aware of what I had done. I had killed for no reason. I had maimed and then killed this poor creature. And for no reason at all. To simply satisfy my own curiosity.
I felt a chill run through my body as I realized how callous and unfeeling I could be. The potential for such violence and death from my own hands was, prior to this, unfathomable. But here it was, in plain, sickening view and I knew from this day that there would be more opportunities. I was no longer my mother's wonderful, innocent child. This would be the beginning of many secrets I would keep to myself. And from that day on, the world became a little uglier.

Step This Way Please

Here's a little rundown on what to expect from the new and improved, "Here's one..." It will, of course, contain the little nuggets of goodness you've come to expect as well as some new writing. I'm planning to use this as a platform for all of the writing I do. So instead of filing them away in some folder, I'll place them here where I can begin to accumulate something resembling a body of work. Right now, I'm in a "writing-centric" frame of mind, so there might be a good amount coming. That, and the encouragement (verbal beating) from hubby might get this going to something that even a mother could be proud of. And yes, she who rules from afar, will be invited to peruse. Right now, there's a little file folder on my desk containing stuff I've already done recently, so if you're real good, I might be posting these. Who am I kidding? I'm gonna post 'em whether you like it or not...

Thursday, May 14, 2009

And We're Back!

Sorry for the delay....two years approximately. But to everyone's great delight (I can hear the crickets chirping), the blog previously known as "Here's one..." is back. Everything you remember is here: the sass, the awkward transitions, the rambling of things that mean absolutely nothing to anyone but myself...it's all here! New and Obama-improved! We have stories of my nephew Mikey, now with his sister, Julia! I'll regale you with tales from the land of Zalmond. Of my yearning (whining) to be a writer. Being on the dole in 2009! and SO MUCH MORE! You'll wonder how you got along without it!
So, tell your friends and write your momma 'cause this puppy's ready to hunt...